Monday, August 25, 2014

Still smiling

Sitting in the morning light
Feeling all my fears fly by
Dread with every thought and tear
Not surprised by my cry

Writing takes away my tears
But my dreams just won't happen here
What goes on in my life
Makes me wither away each night

People come and try to help
But I just want to keep to myself
Please don't be hurt or start to cry
It's not your fault I want to die

Don't be scared, I'll be fine
I promise that I did not lie
Looking forward I start to smile
All your love could last for miles

Tuesday, August 12, 2014


You want to tell the truth
But you don't want to hurt
Those who love you

So you hide behind a door
So dark that no one can tell
Just who you are

Should I come out and be myself
Or should I hide
Until there's no one left

No, no, no
Go just go
Out the door

For now I see
I am acceptable

Friday, August 8, 2014

What do you mean?

One of the biggest problems in my life is my lack of communication skills. As an INFJ, I can feel people getting confused and frustrated by me but I can't change it.

It affects my relationship with my family and my friends. My friends think it's hilarious. They hear what I say but don't understand what I mean. Then, I become known as the random one when I'm really still talking about the same topic as them.

My family, however, has stopped thinking it was cute. As the youngest, I'm expected to be a little strange. But I was supposed to grow out of it at some point.  I was supposed to learn how to "use my words." Instead, that phrase has been used so much I hate even thinking it, let alone hearing it said to anyone.

It's not about trying. It's not rude nor does it show my disinterest. I don't know how to get my thoughts across using the words in my vocabulary.  Something is always left out. I have to remind myself that it's not my fault. It's not my audience's fault. And then I take a deep breath and start over.

Sunday, August 3, 2014


18 years ago
There was a little song
A little gulp, a little burp
To a baby it belong
And that baby sang
Sang and sang it all day long

8 years ago
There came little sighs
A shaky breath and a hug
Happens every time that she cries
A passionate wipe
Wiping the tears from her eyes

10 years ago
The little girl heard
A whisper,  a hum
Some sad news from a bird
That yelled and called
Called as she turned

13 years ago
Beth felt her heart
A smile and nod
Her heart too would start
Beating with love
A love that was never tart

18 years old
The girl set free
She found the woman
She grew to be
And lived happily ever after
Well, we'll see